» Grammar Is Sexy, Shortcuts Aren't

We are all quite aware that today's generation is the text message - or, I should rather say, 'txt msg' generation. We have the little shortcuts our thumbs dig in to when we are writing a message on our cellphones: the lack of the capitalized I, the lovely 'you' word being diminished into a single letter, “U.” It shames me to say this, but even I am guilty of surrendering to these shortcuts when hastily typing a message to a friend on my little phone device. Then we have the IM programs, such as AIM™ or MSN™. No matter how fast we are able to type, some of us realize that we save a tiny portion of time if we don't type out 'see you later' and replace this with 'c u l8r'.

Does that make your inner syntax unicorn* cringe? Because it makes mine weep! I certainly do not spare on words when I type an IM to a friend. My excuse on doing it on the cellphone is that my old little brick is uncomfortable to type on and I need to economize as much words as I can if I want to type it fast, but, even so, I don't use that many shortcuts for words.

But, alas, what you do within your circle of friends is okay because you're not really trying to scare people away from you nor hope to get fans - okay, maybe you are, but not in the way a webcomic is supposed to. Notice I used the word webcomic here, because I am talking about the amateur comic artists around the world wide web (that's right, the WWW), because no professional comic would ever have shortcuts along the script, save for emulation of a certain accent, like the "yo momma" that is so very common. But that is a whole different subject. I'm not here to talk about accent emulation nor grammar - well, yes, about grammar, but not in the way you are thinking. No, I'm not going to make sure you know the difference between "your" and "you're" (but you really should). No, that task is up to the Syntax Unicorn**. My objective in this little article is to make sure webcomics do not make the readers shriek and scurry off at the sign of text-message speech within a webcomic.

We all know that webcomics are known not for their professionalism but for their raw charm (read this as a quality). Editors and any oppression made by any company is not enforced, for the authors are not patronized by any "producer,” so to speak. They are free and occasionally schedule-less, there is no pressure to meet deadlines and so forth. Alas, this also means that there is no quality control, for lack of a better expression. Grammar mistakes will be made, a little line-art hiccup is bound to happen here and there. This is all acceptable because, really, the authors are offering us their work without us having to spend a cent. While grammar is rather nice, there is probably nothing worse than - yes, you guessed it - shortcuts or text-message speech. Slapping within the speech balloons "i <3 u" is a bad way of executing a webcomic. Sometimes, innovation is good. Text-message speech, however, is not. Especially because not many readers can understand some of those really crazy shortcuts and letter swappings, and so forth. But, as noted, it's not a professional work, so why bother?

Well, if you let me, I'll drabble a little bit.

Shortcuts aren't attractive at all and you are bound to receive some harsh criticism from some - and I'm not talking about the Grammar Nazi that lurk in every web-corner, but about the general public. It's ugly to see your character talk in text-message. A comic - online or otherwise - is, in a way, a book with pictures. You are not going to pick up a book and read it if it's all written in text-message speech. Anyone that would print such book would probably expect to go broke fast. A webcomic, albeit exactly that - something in the internet - is probably going to send potential readers away because they will get tired of figuring out what certain parts of the speech actually mean. It will most likely push people away from giving good, constructive criticism because of the horrible 'code' it uses. It's tiresome to read something written in that speech, to the point where people will just drop out from loss of interest.

So, before you start scripting something, remember, those few extra nanoseconds it takes for you to write "why" instead of "y" might be just worth it. After all, if we are exposing our work online, we, more often than not, expect some kind of praise, thoughts or constructive criticism for it. Good grammar and complete sentences might bring you just that.

See you in the next issue!

- Ness

* syntax unicorn: a light, happy and good-natured version of everyone's inner grammar nazi.

** Syntax Unicorn: This would be Charlie.